A jack of all trades and a master of none

Reconsidering Marriage

2012-01-18T08:47:00.001-08:00

I don't like marriage. Its not marriage per se, but all the expectations and social meaning attached to it. The traditional roles and responsibilities. Women want to be respected as modern and equal partners in the marriage relationship but still insist on ceremonies that are weighted with old values and meaning.

People talk about divorce rates near 50% in America as a bad thing, symbolizing the decline of family values. No one talks about the fact that for generations it was illegal to divorce so women were often trapped in mentally and physically abusive relationships. Divorce allows women a way out. It brings a small degree of parity, a check
and balance structure. Divorce rates might be more indicative of gains in women's rights than a decline in family values. After all, if we truly valued our mothers, sisters, daughters, wouldn't we want them to divorce a man who thought it his right to beat her?

And wouldn't we also want our sons and brothers to be healthy and happy and fully actualized people. So we would encourage them to leave unhealthy relationships as well.

If we valued children and their safety, would not we encourage responsible parents to leave a spouse that was a threat to the safety, well being, and happiness of the children?

Do we really value the institution over the individual lives that comprise it?

And why such debates about gay marriage? They validate the legal structure of marriage as it is. And family law in America is archaic.

For example, I married while living in Cali, the moved to Georgia then separated and i moved back to cali. My wife stayed in Georgia where she soon got pregnant by a new man, before we were legally divorced. Did you know that Georgia law does not allow a woman to put any mans name on the birth certificate of her child other than her husbands if she is married? Even if paternity is not in dispute and all parties acknowledge a different man is the biological father. Furthermore, courts in Georgia also hold the husband fiscally responsible.

It was not an issue for me, but the fact that it was something I had to even consider shows our energies are in the wrong place.

Why does Young Jeezy have to pay 30k a month in child support? What child needs that? There should be ceilings on child support so that it cant be abused. People unfortunately do use children for economic reasons which is never healthy for children.

But why does society automatically give more rights to an absentee parent than a person who raises a child if that person is an aunt or cousin or grandparent? The laws don't reflect the reality of society. We need to reconsider family law, and the institution of marriage itself, to reflect the modern complexities and advancements in though of our contemporary world.

I do NOT want children

2012-01-17T07:15:00.001-08:00

I do not want children. It seems to amaze most people when I say it, but its hardly something I even give a second thought. Its like if I asked you if you wanted a tattoo. For most people, either you do or you don't. But most people who do not want to mark themselves forever do not spend great amounts of time agonizing over why they do not want to spend hours on a table enduring a painful process only to be permanently branded with a scar that will eventually fade, loose its novelty and allure, and possible become an act you regret but cannot undue.

But if I had to give it a single reason, more specific than the obvious selflessness of it all, i would say it is because i have not found or met anyone i would feel comfortable with as the mother of my children. Lets ignore the fact that only a selfish bastard would bring an innocent child into this world. Let us also ignore the fact that there are more than enough parentless children in need of safe, stable, secure, nurturing homes that are as readily available as duffel bags of corn chips at Costco.

I am a particular and peculiar man. I know this about myself. I have some unique and sometimes complicated views of life, and people. And by extension, I have some very specific notions of child rearing. And i am not willing to compromise on those. Nor am i willing to spend the rest of my life in constant battle with the mother of my child...or her mother. So rather than argue with a woman about why she must breast feed, and breast feed only, any child of mine until he or she is at least 6 months old, i just avoid the situation. Because at five months and 3 weeks when she decides its ok to let the baby taste his or her first juice or piece of fruit or mushy rice i will be forced to make that most difficult of choices... stay and fight and possibly hurt my child's mother, or walk away. From my child. Forever.

I do not want children.

The Death of Books

2011-12-10T11:22:00.001-08:00

I read a lot. Some would say too much considering that I prefer books
to people, and often read in crowded places when I should be
socializing... Like the dinner table, or at night clubs.

Ebooks have allowed me to read even more and interact with people even
less. I carry 1000 books with me on my kindle and always have a few
dozen on my smart phone. I am literally never without something to
read. And its glorious.

A good friend of mine, who happens to be an English teacher (do they
still have those?), hates ebooks. She hates my kindle, and refuses to
read any ebooks. I tell her she reminds my of my high school
chemistry teacher who insisted we learn to use a slide rule (google
it) because according to him 'you won't always have a calculator
available.' Could he possible have been any more wrong?

With the proliferation of ebooks one can only wonder what the future
holds for traditional books. I for instance, always wanted an oak
paneled library in my home, with floor to ceiling first editions. Now
I just want a wireless network and a good external drive dedicated to
books, newspapers, dissertations, and other random drivel I accumulate
digitally. I have not only lost the need for books, but even the
desire for them as collectibles.

Don't get me wrong, I haven't given up on books completely. I recently
opened my own used bookstore. Its called Uneven Table-leg Spacers &
Things.

--
Sent from my mobile device

Back on my soapbox!

2011-12-07T01:30:00.000-08:00

Well, after a long hiatus, I am back, with absolutely NOTHING important to say. But I will say it anyway. I will be honest, sarcastic, crass, funny, and most often... totally and completely baseless.

I took down my earlier posts and am essentially starting this blog anew. So sit back, relax, and shake your head at the fact that you are sitting there there wasting your time even bothering to read this drivel.

Happy reading!

Ahh.... another baseless opinion.... MINE!

2007-06-20T21:50:00.000-07:00

Seems as though the Internet is full of opinions. Most are boring and not worth the bandwidth they use up but many are actually quite interesting. The problem with most of these, however, is that they are totally and completely baseless. The Internet has allowed any fool with access to an unattended computer the opportunity to post their drivel in cyberspace with all the pomp and circumstance of a legitimate authority!

Its disgusting!

But who am i to stop the flood of misinformation into the universe? And would i really want to if i could? I mean, after all, why shouldn't Joe Blow get to tell the world what he thinks of gay marriage and the War in Iraq? Why should Fox News, CNN, and the New York Times have a monopoly on slanted opinions and biased reportage passed off as legitimate, objective news? What makes Bill O'Reily more of an authority on foreign policy than some bitter war vet posting his rants from the local public library?

Yeah... That's right... he has a right to tell us how communists are running Hollywood and the government is getting all its new technologies from captured aliens. Maybe i have something to share too. Hell, i have been on this planet long enough to know that everyone has an opinion... but not everyone has a blog (not yet anyway). So here's mine. Take it for what it is... nothing. Just ramblings of an unqualified, self proclaimed expert. A jack of all trades and a Master of None...unless i happen to be writing about it, at which time i will claim to be an undisputed, undeniable genius in the field!

Let the games begin!